Sunday, October 31, 2010

Trick or Treat...DAY TWENTY EIGHT!!!

Happy Halloween Everyone!

First off let me say this... there is really no end to my generosity. I have been offering the kids that come by the house some of my COVETED and hard to find Edemame and Carrot Puree ..OR they can feast in the TREAT option of some Tomato Gazpacho.

I have also offered to karate chop them in the esophagus if they find that to be a TREAT.

I am so shocked that so far - not ONE of those damn kids had taken me up on the offer. Weird how they would rather have a king size chocolate bar...????



All that junk food, all those empty calories, all that processed nasty deliciousness..... all that going straight to the back of their junior Thass started kits....

I bet ALL of their cellulite farmers have a woody tonight.

For all of us...this is our inner fat girls prom night. Halloween...the night we get BAGS of candy from strangers. Then hide half of it in our closets so when our parents take it and dole it out in acceptable rations we can still go to the "stash" and eat KitKat mini bars until faces fall off.

good times.


It's ok though - I'll skip the candy. No KitKats for me, thank you. I couldn't possibly have a mini candy bar anyway. I am STUFFED from my 4oz serving of blended chicken and celery soup.
I couldn't eat- I mean drink - another bite.

"Bitterman, party of one. You're table is ready. Bitterman, party of one"

ok, ok... I sound a little bitter tonight about being denied a tiny, itty bitty bite of candy.
But you know what? If I look at the names of some of the candy's - they speak directly to why I DO NOT usually eat them.
I try not to eat at establishments or eat food items that basically tell you exactly what will happen if you eat them too often.
For example...

Whoppers.
Blimpies.
Fat Mo's.
Mounds.
Chunky Monkey.
...you get the picture.

So, after skipping the candy basket tonight - which all jokes aside - wasn't really that hard...but it's much more funny to act like it was torture... I decided to sit down and write today's blog.

That , of course , made me think "Blog - what an odd word." If you think about it - my blog topic is kind of perfect because I think blog sounds more like a word that would describe a big, fat, dimplie swamp ass -than a random opinion or writing.

"Gosh, she's REALLY put on some weight. She's kind of getting a big ole blog ass."
Am I right???

I digress - so today...day 28!!! can you believe it??? I only have TWO MORE DAYS!!!
 Today was a pretty good one all in all.
Sunday's tend to be much more easy that Monday- Friday, due to more free time.
After waking to no power on at the house..?... James and I went on a drive and took Stevie out to throw the ball at the park. Since there was no way to get started on my workout without power to turn on Tracy. Even though I probably know it all by heart at this point, somehow it just wouldn't be the same without her leading me through the paces and all the while giving me the stink eye.

I will say this - I am more than ready to move on to a new DVD. I'm getting really burnt out on the same dance moves.

I say that, but I am a little nervous about being released into the wild with no actual schedule to guide me from day 31 on...
I'm sure I will figure it out! AND with all the amazing tips you guys offer  I will devise a plan that works.
They only thing I need to tweak is the time ...surely the next phase won't require 3 hours of working out a day???? Cause I'm loving what I'm seeing happen to my body and want to keep it up...but 3 hours a day is a little excessive for day in and day out.

Does anyone know an exact plan? I bought all the DVD's - I was thinking I would start the design series...???

Love to hear what everyone else is doing!


I felt MUCH better today doing my workout. Not that I was grunt, sweat and cursing free - because that is NOT going to happen with this plan...but I wasn't wishing I would suffer some bizarre accident to put an end to it either.

According to my heart rate monitor... I burned 1300 calories. That's A LOT. Surely I am not chocking down 1300 calories of goop in 4 oz doses...? Surely I will eventually drop to 127 even though I am getting more muscular every day?
I really don't know! and don't call me Surely.

I stayed at 128 again today...but it's sooooooo close to going all the way down to 127. Come on you little stubborn son of a bitch!!! DROP- DAMN IT DROP!!!!
I thought a lot about it today in my workout.

I thought about that one pound of fat going away. I thought about the old man skin on my stomach going away. I thought about the Halloween candy - oh wait - I didn't mean to admit that. I thought about the Thass and the bathing suit and how far I'd come in thirty days...and that really helped me to dig a little deeper and push a little harder.(not the candy - the other stuff)

I think for the first time, maybe ever, I feel like working out hard is for a reason and not an illusive promise. That in and of itself motivates me.

You know what else motivates me??? This... I went to grab some cut offs to throw on to watch the Titans game (they lost, CRAP!) anyway - I grabbed my "smaller" cut offs thinking - "Hey, I bet these fit now!". I pulled them on and I am not exaggerating when I say - they fell off. Literally fell straight back down to the floor!!!!!!
I stood there in my bra and panties with my cutoff's at my ankles laughing. I was sort of in shock.
I picked them up to check the size again, yep. they are the smaller ones.
Weird, huh?
Then I grabbed some other ones...the ones in the back of the drawer...the ones with the tags still on them.
Why? because I obviously bought them for the body I have in my brain movie. I have never worn them because they are so small that they cut into my thigh fat the last time I tried them on. Sware.
So- hey maybe they will fit now.... I pull them on and they are HUGE and baggy.
All measurements aside, all scales be damned, all body fat pinches ignored - this one moment was the most shocking realization I have had to date as to how much my body is changing.

I guess when you see yourself everyday you see the changes a little at a time. This was shocking.
I was fired up! and furthermore I felt proud of myself! That's a big double whammy of self love that no SNACK SIZE ALMOND JOY will ever give ya!!! (although I should mention that I F-ing LOVE Almond Joys!!! Sorry - I do... I mean they have the word JOY in the name...come on!!!)

So after the very welcomed "shorts that now fit revelation"...I am beginning to wonder about what I am going to wear to the upcoming award shows in November. Remember - we are in the music business...so we will be attending the BMI awards (for songwriters and publishers) and the CMA's (Country Music Association)  and they are back to back.
I have been planning on wearing the spectacular dresses that I bought for last year and didn't wear. Why...it was a classic Thass block. I bought them and then a month later my fat ass couldn't get in them.

But now I'm wondering if - like almost everything else in my closet - I've shot right through them????
I would try them on but they are in the closet that is currently behind my giant mirror that I dance in front of everyday! I tried to move it the other day by myself but I smashed my finger. It hurt like shit.
I preferred it to some of the leg work.

James may have to help me move it again to get the dresses out so I can see if they fit...or are TOO BIG!!! haahah! oh damn! I may have to go buy some new clothes!!!

I can't wait to get measured again on Tuesday!!! Although I cannot imagine the numbers being much different from last time (on day 19) - who knows...that's what I thought last time and they were bigger drops than the first ten days.

either way - I'm very happy with several things...
I am happy with my results - (side note: I just accidentally typo'd "results" and I looked down and it said "resluts". In my infinite immaturity - It made me giggle)
I am happy I gave this program a chance.
I am happy I did it by the book.
and I am happy it's almost over!!!

Tomorrow is like Christmas Eve .... or  Thass-mas Eve!!!!
Then it will be Thassmas Day!!!!

I will post all my numbers on Tuesday night and will post photos - on Tuesday or Wednesday! Promise!!!

I will have to drum up some "before" shots - because I took some on my Iphone and then I dropped my Iphone and it blew up and I did not have them on my computer yet.
I take that as a VERY CLEAR sign that I do not need to post before pictures of me in my bathing suit on the Internet - because I am very good with pictures and emailing them and saving them, etc - I never "lose" photos...so it must be diving intervention.
But I will take some photos for you guys to see what I look like "after"....
and who knows! Maybe Tuesday's "after" shots will one day be my old man stomach skin's "before" shots!!! Dare to dream!

You know, if you think about it - going to a cleanse the last five days is kind of genius. I never thought I would lust after a half-grapefruit or some seared fish over dry lettuce.
Maybe it's part of the big trick to ease us back into longing for healthy foods. Because at this point - any healthy, regular -SOLID - food would be very exciting!!!

Well played Tracy. Well played.

I am almost there, people - ALMOST THERE!!!

I couldn't be more happy to know you will all be there when the ribbon stretches across my chest (which- has shrunk considerably, btw) and I cross the finish line!


I am sore. I am tired. I am proud of myself.

and as it turns out - all the time, all the effort, all the sweat, all the hard work-... I am worth it.

 28 DAYS DOWN...
  2 DAYS TO GO...

 all BY THE BOOK...

 xoxoxLa



PS- I pooped today!!!!! :) Made me very happy. Exceedingly happy.
       Is that odd????

Saturday, October 30, 2010

DAY TWENTY SEVEN...

"Oh, I'm sorry WALL, I didn't see you there - obviously - or I would have slowed down before I hit you."

That's kind of how my workout went today.

I was trucking right along in my muscle work and then... oopsie. I started my cardio and got through 20 minutes and literally could not do it. I ran out of steam due to maybe not drinking enough vile juices yesterday. So, for the first time, I had to stop my cardio -20 minutes into it -and go downstairs and drink another serving of what ever culinary delight was next on the menu.

I waited about twenty minutes for my blood sugar to recover and then went and finished 40 more minutes of cardio.
Oh, and did I mention that I finished my cardio at 8:30 at night?? I shouldn't wait till evening -it's always more difficult for me then- I know better than to do that.
I briefly considered jumping off my roof in the hopes of aquiering a severely mangled ankle.  I  thought I could post a photo of me on crutches to accompany my explanation of not finishing my cardio and maybe gain some crowd sympathy.
"See, I would have finished my cardio, but I COULDN'T because my ankle is severely mangled."
Problem was - my ankle was just fine.

I can now say, without hesitation that tonight was BY FAR the hardest it has ever been to do the cardio. The muscle work was the normal level of grueling, but I just had no energy what so ever to get through the cardio.
I am guessing that my "out of gas" prognosis was spot on because after I drank another juice I rocked the rest of the cardio and pushed myself really hard...especially since I was in a little bit of a shame spiral over taking a forbidden break.

I rationalized the break with several things...

1. I felt as though tripping and falling due to my feet not working, or passing out seemed like improper form and quasi dangerous - hate to injure myself this late in the game.
2. I felt as though getting 40 minutes straight -and with gusto- would make up for stopping to get fuel. Especially because the first portion of muscle work and 20 minutes of cardio took 2 hours and 20 minutes. good grief.
3. Because I looked down and my give a shit meter was not working - so it was an easy call to make.

I guess sometimes you have to just make the call between what Tracy tells you and what your body tells you. My body was the only one there tonight - so I listened to it. Sorry Tracy...but I felt even you would have agreed with me on this one. Plus I got every last freaking minute of my cardio in...and it was the workout equivilant of Kale juice tonight.
Yesterday - it was a breeze, today a killer. I guess you never know.

MY weight is still at 128...but it ALMOST went to 127...EEEEEKKKKKK! hopefully tomorrow - I am not counting half pounds... I can only report it when it is a solid pound lost.

I am realizing that I am not more hungry during the cleanse - just hating about half of the drinks.
But I do love a couple of them - so I'll just choke them down and deal with it.


(male readers: spoiler alert... you may not like what I'm about to say, because it's just not a very pretty topic, so feel free to skip down a paragraph)
I do have one more complaint....
MY KINGDOM FOR A HEARTY BM!!!!!! I would give my kingdom. My kingdom and all the gold in it for a good POOP. I gotta tell ya - I was trucking along with all sorts of delightful regularity and then (insert sound effect of needle scratching across record) - it all came to a halt.
Is anyone else having this problem? Is it because of the cleanse? or is it because of no Kefir???

Maybe I was so dreading the cleanse that I was "scared shit-less".
oh well, shit happens...or in this case... doesn't.
ok- no more poop jokes.

(male readers - you may unplug your ears now and re-join the conversation)

After such unpleasant topics of conversation - I would like to report on some more positive news...

I am watching my skin actually start to get less saggy and old man-ish!!!! I can see more and more muscle - and in places I've never even seen muscle on me!!!!
I believe that if I continue the hard work (even past the thirty days) that I will actually be able to have a body I never thought I would be able to have.
Wow. that's hard for me to even process.

I might actually - one day - with some more hard work...wait for it... like the way I look in a bathing suit..!!!???? Did I just say that?
 Is that even a possibility? I am beginning to think that for the first time in my entire life it might be a possibility.

You would be shocked at how far I can go on a mustard seed of hope.

You know - my goal has always been to try and look good in a bathing suit. Notice I did not say "to look good naked."
Why... because let's face it - it's much more difficult to look good in a bathing suit than it is to look good naked.
If you are naked you are typically one of two things...by yourself, or with a happy man ... if it is the latter, the man is so damn happy he is with you- and so happy you are naked- that he is not at all concerned with minor flaws in your body. He's just happy about the lack of clothing and probably focused on your bits and pieces and hoping it's a good time to play with your jungle kitty.
Just sayin'.

But in a bathing suit- you are more likely to be in a group of people, in public, and (gulp) walking around.
 WAY MORE TRICKY to look good doing that, if you ask me!

Moving on...
So many of you have been kind enough to ask me to keep blogging after the thirty days and after giving it some thought, here's what I have decided...

 I think I can officially say that I am enjoying talking about myself far too much to not keep blogging after the thirty days are up!!!!!

There will be follow up Tracy workouts and trial and error methods of employing her food plans to talk about.
There will be continued battles with Farmer Celly and inner fat girls - although they are very quiet these days!!
Then there are all the other antics I seem to always get myself into - which I haven't really even touched on during the past month- but trust me- I'm always into something. One thing is for sure, I am rarely bored or boring..and since my edit button has been broken since birth- I am kind of like the female version of Simon from American Idol...I usually say what others only think.
I should probably take more opportunities to go to zipit.com - but where's the fun in that?

So- maybe not daily blogging - but for sure I'll keep you guys in the loop as to what is going on and hopefully help cheer those of you on that are beginning your journey, or simply maintaining your results after a successful boot camp!

What do ya think? you guys willing to keep following me and my ramblings a little while longer?
Who knows what we can stir up!!!!


Back to the thirty day journey...
I was thinking today about how important it has been for me to do this to perfection.
and although I've touched on this before - I felt it was worth bringing it back up again.

The reason I HAD to do this BY THE BOOK (besides the fact that for me - that was part of the challenge) was because I did not feel I could get through it if I ever "broke the seal".
That is what my friend and trainer Joel calls it - and I love that!!!
Once you "break the seal" it becomes easier and easier to make little exceptions and excuses, rationalizations and alterations to the plan.
I was too afraid that if I ever "broke the seal"- even once - I would be in trouble!!!

So the daily mantra I repeated when I wanted to cut corners, shorten cardio, take a little bite of this or that, skip a meal, add a meal, have a drink or just not perform to my highest and best ability was ...
"Don't break the seal".

Another version of the same thought - and a mantra I have used for years to combat my bitchy inner  fat girl, my stinky inner chain smoker, and all other addictive personalities that lurk in the dark recesses of my self- is this one...

"If I don't start, then I don't have a problem."

Simple as it may be - it's a powerful thought.
If I don't have one cigarette, then I won't have two. If I don't have two then I couldn't possibly have a third which can lead to me smoking again.
(btw, just for the record - as disgusting as it is - I have been known to sneak a little smoky treat now and again - but I'll keep trying not to do that for the aforementioned reason. And because it causes a slow and painful death -which is not a secret - it says so on the box)

If I don't have the first cookie , then I don't eat the whole box. and, consequently don't have to drive to the store to replace it so I am not embarrassed or have to admit I ate the whole box.

Anyway - you get the idea.
It has helped me tremendously to get through this thirty day experience by asking myself - when I want to crumble - is this worth breaking the seal?
If you don't start (shortening reps, skipping cardio, sneaking a bite of extra yummies) then you don't have a problem.

Having said all that - I also think its worth mentioning that with a little extra mental effort you can "re-seal" your will power if you have a slip up.

It's not the end of the world. If life gets in the way, or you simply cannot refuse the lure of the siren call of some vino or a snack - then first off- for God's sake- enjoy the vino or snack and don't feel guilty about it!!!!!! If you aren't going to enjoy it, then why have it???
Just draw a line in the sand after wards and make up your mind that you are officially "re-sealed" for the rest of the day, then week , then thirty days!

I've always said..." one cheeseburger does not a fat girl make" ...it's the eating one wrong bite of something on Thursday and then going into "oh, screw it" mode, now, add an "I'll just start over again on Monday" to that and you have a perfect recipe for  three day binge when all you really had was a small slip up and treat.
Chances are you feel so guilty about shoving everything you can find in your pie hole that you don't even enjoy it.
Welcome to the wide wide world of yo-yo dieting and the world's best recipe for failure and low self esteem.

Don't ask me how I know so much about the topic.
Tracy did ten years of research on her method - I did ten years of my own research ... thank goodness I gave up studying mine- it wasn't working.

So - IF you decide you need to break the seal - make a conscious decision to do so - give it some thought - decide if it's worth it to you - and if the answer is yes - then ENJOY it- and THEN get over it!!! - and get back to the program.

Sometimes, 20 minutes into your cardio you just have to stop and get something to eat, but because you took a break doesn't mean you can't go back and finish strong!!!!


I just want you all to know this... if I saw myself naked right now- I would want to have sex with me.
just sayin'! The Thass is going in the right direction!!!!!

27 DAYS DOWN...
3 DAYS TO GO...

all BY THE BOOK....

xoxoxLa

3 days to go...that's all! I GOT THIS!!!!

Friday, October 29, 2010

DAY TWENTY SIX... FIrst day of the cleanse...

Man- you guys are AMAZING!!! I am serious, the comments you all take the time to leave me are absolutely so inspiring to me - you have no idea. Thank you again, and to all of you who have ever said that I have inspired you to give it your best and do something great for yourself...I am humbled that anything I might have said resonated with you. That really makes me feel warm down in  ma' cockles!
and who doesn't like warm cockles???

So the obvious question for today ...how was my first day of the cleanse???? and my response is this...

ummmm, ok...where's the hidden camera?

there's got to be a hidden camera... and this juice cleanse has to be a joke.

I am so grossly unsatisfied with the "sweet, savory, and soup" options that it is hard for me to put it words. Oh wait - I thought of some words -Yuck. Disgusting. Gag a Maggot.
Yea, looks like I can put it in words after all.

I love the apple sauce stuff..but past that it all goes downhill - fast.

Everything has the same effect on me...first few bites are tasty... all bites after that activate my gag reflex.
This is going to NOT be fun for five days.

I EVEN tried Kale juice again - primarily due to the fact that after looking at the recipe more carefully I realized that in a moment of haste I somehow overlooked that you are supposed to put an apple or pear in it to help with the flavor!! I laughed at myself and thought I probably gave Kale juice an unfair rap. So I went after it again and this time with PEARS!!! I was very hopeful.
And you know what??? It wasn't nearly as bad....at first sip.
At first sip I thought - oh MUCH better! Then .... the most hateful, angry after taste came on like a tsunami in my mouth and gym sock juice WAS BACK IN THE HOUSE.
MY lord, sweet baby Jesus. Who drinks that nasty ass concoction???

I know some of you like it - and I'm happy for all of you ...and your non-functioning taste buds.
But I am officially OFF the Kale juice. It's not happening. Nope, Nada, No Way, Fu-gett-a-bouwd-it.

Moving on...

So... the last four days are going to be a big NF (no fun) - I'll have to choke down the drinks - because I know better than to try and skip meals. That would work for about one day and then I would crash if I tried to continue working out - AND WE ALL KNOW I'm gonna continue working out! Too close to the finish line to stop now!!!!!

Speaking of - today was interesting - the muscle work was HELL - I mean - "babies head crowning out of the va-jay-jay" HELL - again...then the cardio - well, oddly enough - it was a breeze.
Go  figure.

Again with the pattern - that happened twice before - once within each ten day cycle.

Oh, and did I mention that Im sitting here blogging ..in my size 26 jeans???
Check me out, BITCHES!!!!!!! (hahaah! I mean that in a loving way - not in the way that's getting  Joy Beyhar in trouble) I'm kind of excited about my little jeans! They aren't even as tight!!

I have talked to at least 6 people in Nashville that are starting up the Boot Camp!!! And SO many of you that have been reading are reporting that you are going to give it a go!!!
I'm so proud of you all!!!

I thought about that a lot yesterday and thought I would offer up a few helpful (hopefully helpful)hints!
Mainly focused on time management and the struggles we all face with time and our daily requirements... because this program is a serious time sucker.

Now- like I've said before- I do not have babies in the house - so I realize that makes a huge difference.
But I do have a husband -which can be kind of like a young child at times...and I do work - A LOT.
But I also enjoy the luxury of being somewhat self employed... the good part being I can go to the office when I want -or not at all...the bad part being - I never seem to be done working!!
When you work in the Music Business AND Real Estate...you're on call 24 /7.

So - my tips are being offered knowing that everyone's time restraints and responsibilities are different - but what I think we all tend to share , as women - (sorry male readers - but  you knowing what I'm about to say could make you look like a genius in front of women - so you may want to take notes) ...WE ALL TEND TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYONE ELSE's NEEDS BEFORE OUR OWN.

We tend to be nurturing by nature- and that's a good thing. But we fall in a funny time period in the history of the world, if you ask me.
We are still old enough to remember a time when women primarily stayed home and cooked, cleaned, made and raised babies.
Now we live in a time when women are welcomed in the work force, have jobs, have careers, earn money, run companies...and in addition to that they usually cook, clean, make and raise babies.
Now- don't get me wrong, I am thrilled for the options and thrilled for both career women AND homemakers.


But have you ever noticed how many women apologize for whatever path they have taken???
As if they are damned if they do, damned if they don't. 

Here's the scene: dinner party - standing in small group - everyone introducing themselves...the inevitable question is asked ..."What do you do?" I rarely , if ever, hear a woman who is a homemaker answer without saying it like this... " Oh, I'm just a stay at home mom".

I'm always thinking - "JUST a stay at home mom???" That's the hardest gig on the planet.
 No raises, no promotions, no days off, no accolades - I'm telling you- I am involved in two different jobs and I ALMOST NEVER have any of my clients SHIT THEIR PANTS and ask me to help them do something about it. almost never...

 Now, on the other hand...working mothers always seem to apologize (even if only in tone) when asked this question "Well, who looks after your children?"...
So - you get my point - it's tough no matter how you slice it.

I'm not saying men arent amazing parents, providers and helpful around the house.
I'm just saying that from where I'm standing - Work or no work, kids or no kids, women seem to have more responsibilities that are TIME CONSUMING.
Heck- it takes my husband about ten minutes - total - to get showered and dressed, he could care less about whether the bed is made or not (and seriously James - NOT ONE WORD about how many pillows are on it - we've been through this too many times before) and he rarely cooks or does too many household things. He doesn't do too many household chores MAINLY because I ENJOY doing them - not because he isn't willing -( he is- and he does) - but I like to do those things, I like to keep the house nice and cook for him- it brings me joy. It makes me happy to nuture him and others.

Plus - I learned the hard way that when I ask James to do something I have also figuratively signed a non-verbal contract stating that I will be happy with the way he does the task I asked him to do.
Uh...for those of you that haven't met me in person - I've got two words to describe myself....
CONTROL FREAK.
So, rather than ask James to do something and then me "re-do" it, implying that he did something wrong, when in fact it is just that I am a complete freak who wants things like I want them (thanks for that trait, mom!!!!) I would rather do them myself.
Maybe men are just geniuses - maybe there is a secret code among men that spreads the word...
"Pssst - hey man, take a tip - first time your wife asks you to make the bed - make it like you are a five year old with two broken arms  and she'll never ask you to make it again."
It works.

Okay,  having said all that -  What is it we all have in common? Besides being control freaks...????
Well, It is VERY hard for me - and most women I know- to do one simple thing and that is...ask for help.

We bring it on ourselves - or at least I do anyway, and that is no one's fault but my own.

But the number one most helpful thing I did before starting boot camp and the thirty day journey to reverse the Thass was ...ask for help. From James, from all of you, from my friends and family. I asked for their help.

I sat James down and explained to him what I was thinking of doing and that if I did it I would (gulp) really need his help. I would need him to support me fully (which he always does) and understand that I might not want to travel, might be tired or -imagine this- a little bitchy, I might need him to fix some of his own dinners or run to the store for me if I was out of Kale (I just gagged) -whatever might come up - I would need his help and his support for the next thirty days , because I would be taking this seriously and I would need him to do the same.

He listened, and as always - was completely in and was totally game for supporting me!
He has gone to the store several times when I was working out to grab me something I needed, he knows not to call me while I'm working out. He takes the dog out more, etc and overall has been really excited and supportive and I could not have done it without him! He's even made the bed a few times.
We have a brand new grand daughter names Ceclia- she is 8 months old...it looked like maybe she had made it.
One morning he actually yelled out "Don't FIX IT!" - so I didn't.  That was as hard as the workout. But it was precious. I appreciated the effort and I choose to see the unruly "made bed" as a big pile of love and support.

The more I've thought about my friends that have children - the more I thought - if you can get them involved, let them share in the journey with you - then it is a great opportunity for all of you!

Explain to them that you are going to do something that you are a little nervous about and you need their help! Then thank them everyday for the help they give you! Remind them you couldn't do it without them. Maybe even have a special treat, or surprise waiting for them at the end of thirty days to make it worth their while to keep you going!

But - I think the key is to explain it to your family and friends AHEAD of time so they can process and prepare themselves for the changes in your schedule and what you will be needing form them during the month.
You probably thought about it for a while before jumping in - give them a chance to do the same.

What will you need from them??? Be specific if you can -Is it time alone? actual help? watching a younger sibling? help in the kitchen? making a playlist? getting themselves dressed in the mornings?
whatever it is - explain it to them and get them on board so everyone can cheer you on.

There is something really wonderful in giving your family a chance to GIVE TO YOU, care for you and HELP YOU. They may want to more than you know, but us gals may not give them a chance to very often.
And what a wonderful message to send your kids - "hey, I'm worth my own time and effort. Look what I can accomplish!! Watch my give myself my word and then keep it to myself. "
Stand back you little gremlins - Mommy's kicking some ass in here!!!!!

So...get the family involved.

Get friends involved-
Maybe you have a neighbor, mother or friend that likes to cook (thanks mom for making my breakfast on day two when I was panicking and trying to get to work!)
- see if they want to earn a little extra money for three weeks helping you cook?
Maybe you have a friend that wants to do the plan and you can share cooking meals for each other??

Even co-workers can be helpful - there are days my eyes were rolling in the back of my head from fatigue- if you have a friend at work - tell them about your plan so you can call a last minute audible if you hit a wall at work and need some extra brain power!

And lastly - basic time management of your day will be key.
We all say "we don't have time" and I'm not gonna kid you - this is a MAJOR time committment - but I am here to tell you - IT IS WORTH EVERY MINUTE OF IT - and on day 26 I can honestly tell you it has flown by...

I sometimes I have to "budget" my time like I do money. Wait - bad example - I never budget money, I am a nightare about that - so let's just go back to budgeting time.
I realized , when I was HONEST about it - there are ways to squeeze an extra hour, or two out of my schedule on any given day. It might mean giving up some sleep, tv, email time,  phone time with a friend, or just letting some things go a little during your thirty days - but it can be done!!!

I feel like I have become more efficient in my work day hours as a result of doing this program.

Especially since blogging at night has added to my time problem. But like I said -it's all been worth it! It has flown by and I am on day 26...and in size 26 jeans.
If you'de of asked me 26 days ago if I would have been typing THAT sentence, I would have thought about it over an snack and a cocktail and said - "ha! yah, right."
But that was before I silenced the fat girl in me. R.I.P , Tubby.

So, I guess it is all about what you are willing to sacrifice for thirty days to gain a whole new body.
and I promise you I am getting a whole new body -in thirty days. I still can't believe it!! I've got a long way to go, but I cannot get over how radical the changes are and how fast they have come about.

I know I'm starting to sound like an infomercial but it really does work!!! and by work - I mean WORK!
But it really is hard!!! and by hard I mean, the hardest thing I've ever done.

and it really does take a lot of time!!!! and by time I mean it is taking me sometimes three hours a day to get the workouts in. But I'm making it work.

but you know what DOESN'T take a lot of time now?
Getting dressed!!!!! I don't have to try on ten things to see if I can find that perfect garment that fits, covers my ass and doesn't make me feel like a summer sausage.
Which is a horrible process and can put me in a seriously shite mood.

Well, it's somehow 11:30 pm and me and my time management are going to hit the hay soon so I can get up and do it all again!!!!
Four more days!!??? can you believe it?


 DAY 26 SUMMARY:
WEIGHT: still at 128 - it will be interesting to see if that changes with all this vile liquid cleanse stuff.
ENERGY: good. Haven't felt any dip due to cleanse - but I guess we will see tomorrow!

My knees have been bothering my a tiny bit the last couple of days, but I told them to stop whining since they were hauling around so much less ass. They should be grateful.
MUSCLES: they are popping up everywhere!!! he he. makes me happy! I feel strong and fit - not just skinny - but fit. That's awesome.



And finishing out the day's thoughts... if you do sit your family down, ask for their help, explain how important this is for you ...and they are selfish and do not support you at all or help you in anyway.

Well then screw them! You are entitled to a life too! I would do the program anyway and then put on your size 26 jeans and tell them to kiss your new hot little ass - cause you're are OUTTA THERE. Ungrateful ingrates.
It would be a good time to learn that about your children, because you can probably still teach them otherwise...a man, not so much. Log on to "I'mtotallyhotandyourekindofdick.com" and then follow the directions on the home page under - "get a new man".

Just sayin..

:)

26 DAYS DOWN...
4 DAYS TO GO... (of chocking down juices)

but, all BY THE BOOK...

xoxoxLa



PS- ALL my videos of Tracy's got here today so I will be all ready to try other cardio and mat workout DVD's when I'm done in a few days and keep up the good work! 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

25 "X's" ...ALL PERFECT...ALL IN A ROW! Let's cleanse now!

DAY TWENTY FOUR...and TWENTY FIVE!!!

HERE I AM!!!!

I went AWOL (sorry!) for a day ...and may I say, with the warmest heart, how touched I was that anyone even noticed, much less, took the time to ask what happened and when I would be back!!!

"They LOVE ME , THEY REALLY, REALLY LOVE ME!" - or at least they love LAUGHING at me!!
Hey - I'm good with it either way.

But seriously - thank you for following and thank you for your concern.

to answer some of the questions you all have asked me in your comments...

1. No, I did not "keel over"

2. No, I did not "cave" - (I would have fessed up if I had...probably.)

3. Yes, I did have another perfect day!!!!! Well, perfect in the Tracy Anderson world

4. YES - I did go to college in OK - University of Oklahoma, Boomer Sooner , baby!

5. No, I am not a writer. The last thing I wrote besides emails and thank you's were papers in college - so I'm VERY flattered that you guys are SO STINKIN' SWEET to say nice things about my writing. I promised myself when I decided to blog that I would be honest and just sit down and write. I would not worry about what I was going to say, I wouldn't edit, or worry about typos, misspelled words, punctuation, grammer or all the other things that got me in trouble with many a teachers red pen.
I promised myself that I would just tell you guys what was on my mind. and what was on the back of my legs...and what was on my plate...and what wasn't.

I'm glad you've enjoyed it...or I hope that you have enjoyed it - and I must say that I AM SHOCKED, in the very best way, that people want to hear my eternal ramblings. Thank you again for reading and wanting me to continue rambling even after my thirty days are done! Who knows...maybe I'll just come up with more things to talk about. Life, after all, is always a challenge and there's always a lot to dish on!!!

4. and lastly...Yes, I do work.. two jobs in fact -thus the problem with yesterday and not blogging.

So, I'll get right down to it...

WHERE THE HELL DID I RUN OFF TO YESTERDAY???

What could have possibly been sooooo important that I couldn't find the time to blog to you all about my workout and my ever lifting Thass???

Well, truth be told - a big dose of life got in my way, took my time and took my blog!!!

Yesterday in a nutshell was, well - busy. It started off the way the last 24 days have...with a grueling 3 HOUR workout...good grief...followed by a fast shower, hair and make up and then off to the office with lunch in hand.
Although I felt great throughout the workout - it was a killer.
And I was so excited about LUNCH...only to realize it was a big pile of vegetables.
I mean, really??? I felt like a child who was told I would get a fabulous prize if I raked all the leaves in the yard and bagged them up. My prize? a big, fat, plate of vegetables. Did I mention that this kid lives on three acres?
suck it, veggie plate.

The kid wanted an X-box and got an Atari.
He wasn't happy.

The frustration of the veggie plate turned out to be a foreshadowing of the remainder of the day.
Although work was great and I was in high spirits- probably due to getting some "your so skinny" comments working in concert with my recently WAY TOO TIGHT jeans kind of falling off a little- but the wheels kind of came off when I got home.

I had a lovely evening planned of hanging with my sweetheart, working a little more and blogging. What I got was, in effect, another mother flickin'"veggie plate", (read: not at all the evening I was expecting)

I walk into my house and there is my precious husband sitting on the couch with two guys there to talk about a business deal that is a big fat nightmare in my books.
I wasn't in the mood to go over "all the finer points" of something I have already dealt with and knew James was over it too.
I felt like I walked in to my home and the grim reaper was sitting on my couch.
"Oh, I'm sorry Mr. Reaper, where are my manners? My I take your sickle? May I offer you something to drink or eat? Kale Juice? Veggie plate?"

Get the F out of my house, please.

By the time they left I was whipped, James was whipped and I still had about an hour of emailing clients back and setting up things for this mornings meetings.

Then it happened...uh oh. I changed my internal radio station ... to you know where. Yep...KFUK.
Oopsie... I don't know what happened. But suddenly I was NOT happy and I felt wildly sorry for myself! Pitiful Pearl was in the house!!! She's a whiner and I don't like her.
At first I felt upset and aggitated. Which made me want a food hug - roadblock - can't eat!!! Then I kind of wanted a glass of wine - road block again- crap! Then I even felt like I wanted a cigarette... a cigarette??? I haven't had a craving for one of those little buggers in a long while - so no way on that one. So without a single "woobie" to medicate with - I had no choice really... and I did what any self respecting woman who is annoyed, tired, over worked and under fed would do... I started crying.

...and apparently I felt that I should cry like it was part of the Tracy Anderson Method - long and hard, without stopping, until it burned.

Once I finally stopped (much to the relief of my sweet James) I felt MUCH better!

Guess the good thing about not having any weapons to use to fight to keep the emotions inside is ...well, they don't stay inside.

So after I "let it all out" I worked a little longer, answered some emails and had a laugh with a friend via Ichat...and by that time it was REALLY late and I was REALLY tired.

It's not that I didn't think about you all - because I did.
But after the veggies, intruders, meltdown and recovery - I just didn't have it in me to write the blog. I am really sorry - but I figured that If I failed to do something properly yesterday you all would understand that missing my blog update was WAY better than me cheating on the diet, workout or program in any way.
Which I didn't.
Which was a miracle.

Just sayin'. Last night was a tough one.

and today was no cake walk either... (I said cake.oh,my god cake. yum. I don't even like cake, but yum.) anyway - today was filled with an early board meeting and more meetings directly after wards - so you know what that means... nighttime workout!
ARGH.

I struggled with it tonight - not the muscle work, but the cardio. And not physically, but mentally. LOTS of internal voices painstakingly explaining to me why 20 minutes was enough. Ok, how about 30 - that's PLENTY. 40 is MORE than you thought you would do because of your crappy night last night. 50 is like wonder woman today - you don't need to do all 60 minutes...

I did all 60 minutes.
BOO -YAH Muther SCRATCHER!!!!!!

THAT is why my ass is getting smaller my friends!!!!!
because I am being a big ole bitch to the whiny little Pitiful Pearl inside of me that wants to curl up and lay down and be a titty suck cry baby!!!
NOT HAVING IT. Eat your veggies, Pearl and wash it down with a big ole glass of Shut the hell up.

Now...anyone on the program, past or present knows what happens after today...I start the LAST FIVE DAYS of the program and that MEANS I start the FIVE DAY CLEANSE.
My God, Tracy. You are a real ball buster, aren't you????? Good girl. We all need a little more ball busting, if you ask me.

I'm nervous about all the "drinks" and soups and ... Kale.
But at this point I could enter the phase where she tells you to eat "poop pudding" and would rock it out. I wouldn't have any friends due to the unfortunate shit breath, but I would stick to the plan!

Tracy... I just want you to know that I saw something that I thought was an urban legend, like Bigfoot, because I have heard of them - but never actually seen them - well, not seen them on MY BODY anyway...wait for it...I saw the junior starter kit version of those killer "V" shaped abs... ON ME!!!! SWARE!!! You know the ones- like Pink has, and Tracy has...the abs that are by your hip bones. I saw signs of them!!! Now, don't get me wrong, they are still hiding under a protective layer of fat and old man skin...but one day they will be holding court all by them selves . I'm going after them! I want them!!! I want them REAL bad. I have never had them - not EVER. oh....but I will. I will.


We are on day 25 people and blog or no blog, bad day or good, energy or none ,solid food or liquids...
WE ARE DOING THIS THING!

I would never break a promise to a loved one (or certainly try not to), so it's about damn time I treated myself like a loved one - and I am doing just that. I am keeping my promise to myself and finishing strong. 30 days - all following the program to perfection...even when the day itself isn't perfect.

Life isn't perfect.
My ass isn't perfect.

But the more I dedicate myself to making positive choices, the more I dig deep to match hard times with hard work, the more beautiful they both get. right?

I am learning to love myself enough to stand up to myself.

That makes me smile.

25 DAYS DOWN...
5 DAYS TO GO...

All BY THE BOOK...

xxoLa

PS- my weight is hanging tough at 128!!! and even though the scale isn't moving much it seems I'm shrinking a little more everyday - at least according to my jeans!!!

PSS- MY husband and I did a presentation today together and he told me after wards that he looked over and saw a totally different body on his wife!!!! A "Half Laura" he called it. He said he was extremely proud. He tells me everyday that he is so proud I've done it by the book!! Thanks, James!!!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

DAY TWENTY THREE...

2 hours and 45 minutes....

That's how long it took me this morning to get through my workout!!!
No wonder Tracy says to treat this like a job... It's like a part time job!


But it wasn't nearly as awful as yesterday...so there you have it folks - we officially have a pattern!

Strong, stronger, crash, crash, stronger , strong...

I'm really glad I kept a calendar now that I'm getting towards towards the end - because it really does show a very clear pattern of struggles and growth. I highly suggest that you keep a calendar with notes on it if you embark on this journey!

Now... I am dealing with some mental burnout issues... but I will deal with those as they come too... because Tracy may be trying to find my breaking point...and  she can look all she wants - because I don't have one, baby!!!!!!

I got this thang!!!

I am starting to get barraged with the same question over and over again... "What do you do after the thirty days?" Up until now - that seemed so far away that I couldn't even really think about it. But now I'm thinking about it. What am I going to do? I guess I will keep going with muscle work and cardio on a regular basis (maybe not 7 days a week, because that would make me a freak) and play it by ear.

Does anyone know of a prescribed "syllabus" from Ms Anderson???
I would love to hear any and all suggestions! How often should we do cardio? How often should we do muscle work? How often should we rotate muscle work???

I cannot be left alone with my recently diminished Thass. We clearly didn't fare so well out on the town without a chapperone before, now did we?
Tracy...if you're out there - I  could use your help with my future plan!!!

I did get to giggling today when I came up with a new slogan for Tracy... wait for it...

"You will hate my guts, but you'll love your butts!!!!" kinda catchy, huh?

James took me to see a movie and I had a funny thing happen.
It only happens on the rare occasions that I lose a significant amount of weight.
And that thing is - you walk past a mirror or a reflective wall and think - "Damn, was that me? Wow, I look really different."
It's almost like it shocks you to see yourself.
Truth is - my mind always takes a little longer to catch up to seeing my body like it really is in real time.
It takes me a while to start "seeing" myself as a thinner person.

Unfortunately for me ..this also applies when I have GAINED weight.
Same thing happens when I walk past a glass building and see myself in the reflection and think...
"Damn, was that me? Wow, I really look different." oh crap, that's not good.

When this phenominon occurs, I lovingly refer to it as yet another case of "inverted anorexia"... when I keep getting bigger but still think I'm small.
It's not good. Not good at all.

So, I am thrilled to report that tonight, for the first time -IN A LONG WHILE - I had one of the mirror moments (at the movie theater ) where I was surprised when I saw my own reflection...I kind of looked tiny-  for me, anyway!!!

I couldn't believe it! I was actually shocked. I was very happy about it. It was boarderline Brain movie small!
I would have been more happy about it with some popcorn and a diet coke...but hey - you can't have it all.
Small ass or popcorn...??? small ass or popcorn??? It's like Sophie's Choice.
well...small ass of course...but that popcorn smelled REALLY good!! Maybe I could split the difference and just butter my small ass..?

something to think about, I suppose.


Tomorrow marks one of two remaining days of actual food... before the dreaded cleanse!!!
How incredibly pitiful will it be when I come back dreaming of a solid piece of fruit? or longing for a single spear of asparagus??
Has ANYONE else done this by the book - if so I would LOVE to hear from you !!!! Or even anyone who has done all five days of the cleanse.... yikes.

But like the rest of this month- I will do it by the book...cause that's how I roll, people.
Well, not usually - but in this instance I do appear to be rolling in that manner. Yo.

I sware - I have not deviated from Tracy's plan by so much as an almond! I have not even licked my fingers when making James dinner ! I have not even considered  cheating - not a single bite!
Although I confess- I must be thinking about it on some level because last night I had a dream I cheated!!!
I was in New Orleans (?weird, right?) and I ordered my favorite drink (vodka/ grapefruit) and said - SCREW IT! I'm going off the wagon and then I grabbed half of sweet potato fry and popped it in my mouth!!! Half a fry -like the little tiny piece that always drops in between your console and the seat of your car - and stays there forever because you can't reach it.  I hate that, btw.

Then they brought me my cocktail and I panicked!!!!! I started freaking out saying "I don't care that I'm in New Orleans (? again, weird with the New Orleans thing..?)- I'm not breaking my plan!!! But then I could NOT figure out what to do about the half of a sweet potato fry I had eaten! Was I  going to confess to you all? Was I going to lie about it??? I was TORMENTED in my dream about it.

Then I woke up.

My first thought was that I was SOOOOO relieved that I hadn't eaten a fry.
My second thought was that I was SUCH A LOSER for being so concerned about doing this without a single slip up that I was dreaming about it!!! Good grief. What a dork.

I used to have similar dreams in the 80's when I would go get a brand new set of long BRIGHT RED ACRYLIC nails on-  then I would dream that I broke and chewed them all off! I would wake up and panic and examine my hands, only to find them all there.

Of course, that was just the skinny girl in me trying to speak out against the horrors of long, bright red acrylic nails - or at least that's my guess. They did not look good on me.

The nails did, however, kind of complete the look of an ugly sweater with shoulder pads,  acid washed jeans and hot rollered hair. Oh- and yes, I topped it all off with a BIG FAT ASS -I mean BIG!  
Early college was not  a good time for my Thass. Actually back then it just grew out and to the sides - it had not yet begun to slide down the back of my legs yet - but it brought all it's ugly friends with it.

Let's just say no one told me that you were only supposed to gain 15 pounds your Freshman year.
I did not get that memo.
I averaged 15 pounds for the first four semesters. I always was an over achiever.

I specifically remember when I was "dieting" in college that we would go to The Mont and I would get a giant ceaser salad and chili con queso with sausage lumps in it!!!! hahaahah!!! oh- and probably wash it down with a LITE beer. I think I have solved the riddle as to why the weight didn't fall right off.


I started getting it a little under control towards the end of college and have been working on it ever since...

So ...here we are - at 41 years young - and I'm the thinnest I've ever been in my life. go figure.
When people say "I wish I could fit into my jeans from high school" - I think - MY GOD- we could BOTH fit into MY jeans from high school.

Most of my friends in high school were models or looked like they could model. I looked more like the photographer.
Oh well, where do you think I developed this winning personality??? HA! When all your friends are more beautiful than you are - your role is clearly defined early on... get funny -or go home!!!
hahaha! so - I guess I got funny! Someone had to entertain all those skinny bitches!
 :) BTW - they are still all my dear friends and they are still all gorgeous!

But, no thanks - I don't want to go back those jeans, please.

Well, folks - I'm tired and guess what I have to get up and do in the morning??????
 AGAIN with the 2-3 hours of sweating and grunting - I think tomorrow morning I'll think back on college and be thankful that I was who I was then - and am who I am now.

We are always exactly where we are supposed to be in life - and at the exact time we are supposed to be there.


Today I am exactly 23 days into a thirty day journey!
I like who I am and I like how I've turned out.
...and I like where I'm going!

 I'm Right where I am supposed to be, and happy to be here!

DAY 23 SUMMARY:

WEIGHT: down 13 pounds! 128!!

JEANS : are more loose by the day - seriously, I do not know how it's possible - but ones that were snug last week are loose now - go figure!

SORENESS: very sore today, but workout was more manageable - although it took 2 hours and 45 minutes to get through it.

Still rocking it out.
Nothing can break my will now! No way- NO how!

23 DAYS DOWN...
7 DAYS TO GO...

all BY THE BOOK!

xoxxoLa

Monday, October 25, 2010

DAY TWENTY TWO...

Man o Man... am I ever tired! For some reason today was REALLY challenging.

It started this morning at 6:15 and I went after the muscle work with gusto and then ran COMPLETELY out of gas...
I don't mean that I got tired, or it was hard, or I had to dig deep... I mean - I ran out of gas and had to pull the junk in my trunk off to the side of the road and put the hazards on...my car came to a complete stop.
That is the first time that has happened in the  past 22 days. For the first time I could not do the cardio right after the muscle work.
My muscles were happy to cooperate, but I literally could not move another step. I was shaky and kept getting dizzy (which, sadly, at times felt like a mild buzz and I kinda liked it a little...is that wrong???) anyway - since I am doing this to improve my fitness and not to be a freak who makes herself sick... I finally had to listen to my body - and my failing blood sugar levels and make the decision to complete my cardio after my work day.

I gotta tell ya - I never really totally recovered all day. I felt whipped and "flu like" all day...it was like the good ole days of the first week. It sucked hind teet.

At least during the first week I knew I was done for the day...today I knew it was "thank you sir, may I have another?" with my cardio waiting for me at home.

I came home and had the perfect answer...a short nap.
I HAD to lay down for thirty minutes, and I think it helped ...a little.

Sooooooo - as if I were carrying an chest of drawers on my back I went upstairs and got dressed and HEATED THE frickin' room to 80 degrees...and went back down stairs to fix James some dinner. I heated the oven down stairs for chicken quesadillas and heated the oven upstairs...for me. ARGH.

Again - who's idea was this??? I would like to kick that persons ass. Oh wait - it was my idea...and I already kicked my own ass today...twice.

I guess I asked for it.

After much procrastinating I did indeed finish 60 minutes of cardio - dancing, sweating, burned 600 calories and got to give myself the half of an X on my calendar!!! That one hurt. That one I EARNED...
I was really proud to get through today - it was a tough one.

It really has been a pattern... I am betting that as sore as I am right now - as exhausted as I am - I bet tomorrow is easier and I feel better. Or at least I can hope that is the case.
For tomorrow to be more difficult than today I would have to be hit by a truck. A big truck. A big ass king cab, diesel pickup truck driven by a big fat man who is hauling another truck. Another big truck....ok- you get the picture!

After my workout I had to eat dinner and -wait for it...go to the grocery store!!!! Really? Could there be a worse chore in the world if you are exhausted AND hungry? Well, I guess there could be - mopping the floor of a donut store maybe. That would be worse.

I found myself staring at most of the shelves, not really remembering why the heebies I was on that aisle in the first place. I would usually remember once I had ultimately given up and moved on to another aisle...then lather , rinse, repeat. It took my an hour to gather a small amount of groceries.
They probably thought I was shop lifting.
I'm sure the Kroger "eye in the sky" was watching to see if I would stuff a ham in my sweatshirt.

I'm also sure that before I started this program they thought I had stuck two hams in the back of my sweatpants!!!

BUT NOT NO MO'!!!

The hiney is getting mo' tiny!!!! Still a long way to go - but definite improvement!!!

James said I should skip my blog tonight and get to bed...but I couldn't leave my girls hanging that like to catch up on my antics after their early morning workout...so I'm a little weary and may keep it short- but this one is for you!

I also asked James to come upstairs and shoot me tonight while I did my cardio... he brought me a flip video camera - I kind of meant with a gun.

So I did take a little footage of my jumping around for all those that do no know what this program is about and what 60 minutes of cardio entails...
I will work that out tomorrow - I'm sure THAT will be good for a laugh!!

You can all see the Thass in action...and who wouldn't want to get an eyeful of that???

OH! after a week at 129... I eeeeekkkked out another pound on the scale....128!!!!!!!
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Mother Scratcher!!! I am soooo excited. I would express my excitement if I could move anything other than my fingers. It's exhausting my hands just to type- I must be activating the cross force vectors in my little hands. Everything on me is sore today!

Who knows what will happen in the next day or two after today's trauma. One things for sure -when it happens - I'll sing like a bird about it to all of you!

I was at my office today and Jason Aldean (a great new country artist, if you don't know him- check him out - he's great!) was down the hall recording an interview with Kix Brooks for Kix's American Country Countdown Radio Show - I saw them as I was limping back to the microwave to re-heat my soup. There is no point to this portion of the story except I wanted to mention how handsome those two guys were just loitering around in the hall.

It made me glad that my ass wasn't as fat as it was a few weeks ago. I'm fairly confident neither of them were checking out my backside...for they are both happily married and respectful guys...and they both know James and that James has lots of guns!!!
But ya know- although I was never a boyscout (duh, I'm not a boy) I do like to pratice the boy scout motto..." be prepared"!!! hahahaah!!! You never know when you'll be re-heating soup and see a couple of handsome men in the hallway - so leave your big fat Thass at home!!!! Right???

It was a little embarrassing when Kix said "Hey Jason, Laura is on this boot camp thing and is blogging about it!  Laura - tell him about your blog and - what's your blog called?"
I just sort of stood there and said..."Well, it's kind of about my ass sliding down the back of my legs.. I call it a Thass. ummmmmm, this is akward."

Ok...well, I'll be walking off now- mildly embarrassed, clutching my soup.

Poor Jason just stood there- not really sure what had just happened. 
Some things don't not translate in every situation. Live and Learn.

Well folks - I'm literally falling asleep at my computer and have to get up early  and do it all again!!!!!

CAN YOU BELIEVE  HOW FAST THIS IS GOING??????



Today we will file under "character builder" - because it was one of the hardest yet.
But it's over and I'm crashing!!!
Proud to have hung tough...

22 DAYS DOWN...
8 DAYS TO GO...

every last one of these little bitches will be BY THE BOOK....

xoxoLa

Sunday, October 24, 2010

DAY TWENTY ONE...

Today was the first day of the third muscle work section...
ummmmm...someone coulda warned me!!!! Holy smoke!!!!

It always takes me longer to do the muscle work on the first day or two of a new section as I'm learning the proper technique...but TODAY...today was like an eternity.
To complete my muscle work and my 60 minutes of cardio it took me 3 hours and 20 minutes!!!!

Sware - I do not know how it was possible - as I was not wasting time - but it took every bit of that time and I thought I was going to sweat to death. The leg lifts and ab work... let me just say this - it's a good thing she did not reveal these little ass kickers until now or I would have given up a long time ago!!!
Oddly enough - when it was time to do my cardio (2:20 minutes after I started) I felt strong and danced like crazy! But the rest of the day I was spent!

I started at 7:20 and did not finish until 10:45! I had to be dressed and in the car by 11:15 so we wouldn't miss the Titan's kick off...so I had to boogie getting dressed. I actually got completely showered, hair dried, make up on, dressed, breakfast down the hatch and lunch ready to take in the car...in 40 minutes!
All on shaky legs.
James was very patient because I really wasn't in the car until 11:30. Thank you James!

I ate my lunch in the car to try and ward off any hunger possible because I  knew I was walking into a stadium full of wiley temptresses...cold beer, hot dogs, pizza, Vodka and cranberry (oh how I miss my vodka cranny treats, one day we will be reunited- and by one day - I mean in 9 days...) chips, popcorn, COOKIES...and even the seemingly innocent Diet Coke...they all whispered my name today.

They called out "Laura, Hey La! Pssssttt... over here.  Don't you miss us? You don't call. You don't write. I thought we were close? We are so confused, where have you gone? Are you coming back ever? Don't you still love us? We miss you. Please come back to us! We need you."

I thought about it for a while and then realized - WAIT, food doesn't talk...it was that damn Farmer Celly - OMG he's a vantrilaquist!!!! I shoulda known.

 He's needing seed for his future crop and is pulling out all the stops. I shut him down. I sat on him.  ...and then drank lemon water for the entire game!
Oh...and did I mention that we are lucky enough to have a suite??? So there was a spread of food and cookies out the ENTIRE game!!! Our wonderful suite manager , Robert ,was kind enough to go looking in the stadium kitchen for some fruit for me...and found me an ORANGE!!!
I felt like a kid on Christmas morning...in 1932 - cause I had an orange in my stocking from Old Saint Nick. Praise Jesus!

It was delicious!!! Truth be told... I did kind of want to poke a hole in it and fill it with vodka and drink it like a little citrus- snack -screw- driver. But , as you could guess - I didn't. But I thought about it!!
Looks like the drunk girl in me is tired of not getting any face time.

The game was one of the most exciting I've ever seen!!! We were NOT looking so good and down by 9 going into the 4th quarter...then all of the sudden -WHAM! We got it together, started turning things around and came out not only with a WIN - but kind of kicked some ass!!!!

If you think about it ...the run down of the game kind of describes me and my Thass battle!!!
Not looking so good - going into the 4th quarter of my life - a time in the game most would think - it's too late to make a come back, you're not looking so good...but then WHAM! Buy a book, heat a room, start a blog, work the plan and not only come out with a WIN - but kind of kick some ass!!!

Moral of the story... it's never too late to turn things around! The clock is ticking but- HEY - we're not dead and there's still time on the clock! So get in the game ladies and gentlemen!

It was so much fun today. Yah know - I'm getting really used to going places and not eating and drinking and still really enjoying myself... goes to show it can be done. I do not plan on always being so stringent -of course- but it's a good lesson to learn that they it is not a requirement to eat like a redneck on a Carnival cruise at every function.


My weight is STILL hanging at 129!!! I moved to 129 last Tuesday and it has held steady for 6 days!
I do want to thank the Universe for allowing my weight to hang up at 129, rather than 130...cause that would have just been mean!!!!
After today's workout, maybe there will be a change tomorrow...not worried about it at all - because there does seem to be a change in the way my clothes are fitting almost every day! That's what really matters!!!

I wonder if I'm going to be let down at the end of this if I don't get to go on a talk show, like say -Ricky Lake, and bust through an old picture of myself when I was heavier and have the "new me" pop through and be greeted by appluase from a loving audience?

You know the show - the one titles "I used to be fat, but know I'm all that!"....

Except on those shows, it usually someone who wants to "get back" at the kid who said something ugly to her in 7th grade. They've brought that poor schmuck on the show and then the traumatized girl who is now "hot" (read: HUGE fake boobs, bad bleach blond hair, a lycra mini dress and acrylic hooker shoes) bursts through for her moment of glory and what happens...the guy doesn't even remember her!!!!!

Those shows are awful!!! But kind of funny. but so awful. but so funny.

Oh- and take a tip- if you are invited to one of those shows for a "make over" and you get there and they ask you to go in the soundproof booth...  You. my friend - ARE NOT getting a make over- you're boyfriend is sleeping with your best friend and they both think they should tell you...on national TV.
 
Oh well, I probably won't break through a "before" photo of myself and that's ok because unless you're a football team taking the field - it never really works out to be a graceful thing.

So maybe I'll just take some "After" photos and post those for my fearless and loving 117 followers to see!!!!!!

I can't believe we are in the home stretch!!! Last ten days...and only four to go before I go to the cleanse phase...oh my....the cleanse phase. Piss on a flat rock.
I'm not looking forward to that to be honest with you.
oh well - let's not borrow trouble! We can deal with that on Friday, now can't we????

OH!!!! and guess what - THERE ARE MUSCLES IN MY STOMACH!!! I would not lie about something this serious, people.
There are actually muscles in my stomach. I see them! I can feel them!!!!
The last time I had muscles in my stomach - I had just eaten seafood...they had been served over linguini.
I'm finally heading towards a six pack... and heading away from the pony keg I was rockin... this is a VERY good thing!!!


Thank you again  for everyone who reads, laughs, comments and just "gets on the field" and plays this game with me! You guys are amazing and it's made all the difference in the world for me ... and I know it will make the biggest difference in how the score board will read at the end of this - it's like my own personal itty bitty stadium of fans cheering me on!!!!

You know what... I may hire some cheerleaders and have James walk up and down our staircase selling popcorn and cold beer!!!

DAY TWENTY ONE SUMMARY:

WEIGHT: still 129

ENERGY: Felt great today , felt strong - but a little shaky and a little tired - but not like it used to be when I was nauseous all day!

CELLULITE - DRAMATICALLY reduced - sware - it's really something to see how much that has changed.

FOOD - tastes amazing to me now. Funny how fruit can be such a treat! It's like little pieces of mouth porn to eat some fruit! in the past I would have skipped the fruit for the cookie next to it - nice to appreciate the REAL taste of real food again.


I continue to be amazed at what Tracy's method and my efforts are affording me in such a short amount of time.  I'm kind of excited about it.
I feel better about myself.
I feel proud of myself.
That's a bigger statement than it seems- coming from me. 
I'm more comfortable making fun of myself than saying something like I'm proud of myself. :)

Thanks again for the support!!

day twenty two...here I come!

21 DAY DOWN....
9 DAYS TO GO ....

all BY THE BOOK!!!!

xoxoxLa

Saturday, October 23, 2010

DAY TWENTY... INCLUDES PLAYLIST!

I can't believe it's DAY TWENTY!!!

That means several things to me...

I'm 2/3rds of the way to the finish line! YEA!!

and...tomorrow starts the new section of muscle work. NOT YEA!!! OPPOSITE OF YEA!!!

Oh dear... that means I will be crippled again for the next two days. Oh well...at this point - I feel like I can handle anything! Um, well...Easy for me to say, cause "at this point" I'm sitting in my jammies on the couch.

Ask me again tomorrow and I might feel differently.
But ya know what...I will deal with THAT tomorrow.
That's the great thing about the future, it only comes at ya one day at a time.
So, I'll try not to borrow trouble thinking or dreading what may- or may not - come after tomorrow's workout!!! or the next day's or the next...

So, back to today... this morning was like magic! I was back to feeling strong and capable!! Go figure..at least I can identify a pattern. I go from one day where I'm barely able to get through it and my muscles are shaking like a Chihuahua in someone's purse to the next day when I wake up with super human powers and kick it's boo-tay.
When given a choice...I prefer the latter.

One thing that really made a difference today was I added a few new songs to my play list.

I'm not sure about you guys, but music is everything to me.

I know that some of you probably love the techno club music with no lyrics that plays behind Tracy's cardio DVD - but if I had to dance to that I would not have made it through the first day.

It's not my cup of tea, as they say. The only time I ever hear that kind of music is on the rare occasion that I get talked into going into a club in Vegas, Miami or LA. You know the kind - the bullshit velvet rope places where to get a table you have to pay $600 for a bottle of vodka - two bottle minimum- and the table top is usually the size of a large pizza. (side note: ummmmm, pizza.) You probably had to know someone to get "ON THE LIST" in the first place and once you're inside..if you're like me... your thought process might go something like this:
"Hey, everyone in here is REALLY young. Hey, that means I am REALLY old - like foot in the grave old.  Hey, who's idea was this for 'girls night'? Ya know what -I don't care if I'm old!!! I'm gonna get out there on that dance floor and Hey - WT..? why are strangers trying to rub up against my ham??? Back off, man child - I'm twice your age and my husband has guns. Hey- has this deafeningly loud techno song been going on for forty minutes?What??? DID YOU SAY SOMETHING???  THUMP< THUMP<  I CAN'T HEAR YOU ...THUMP... someone please shoot me - even though if someone shoots me - no one will hear it!!! ... I'll GLADLY pay for the $1200 in vodka -even though we haven't had a single drink- if someone will get me THE F out of here!!! THUMP THUMP THUMP!!!"
And then we leave.

I'm guessing that is exactly how all those little ham rubbing punks can afford the $1200 bar tab minimums...they just wait for the old coots to come in - knowing they will run them out in ten minutes - and snag their abandoned booze. Kind of well played, if you think about it.
Anyway - I think I've made my point... I do not like that kind of music. Obviously! :)

I'm all about a sexy bar now and again - with loud music and a some dancing. But I like my music to have lyrics,  a driving tempo...and some adults in the room.
Or better yet.. I'll take a juke box, dart board and a booth with draft beer. NOW we're talkin'!!!

So, I say all that to say - my play list is the only thing that gets me through the cardio!  I play her DVD politely "muted" while I blast my own play list from my stereo. which in Tracy's defense, is what she suggests.
Also in her defense - I know what it would cost her to have to license some great music...hence the cheap techno crap.

I know music is like everything else in the world - different strokes for different folks - or as I like to say "every ass has it's seat"  - meaning everyone likes something different... and thank God for that - if everyone liked the same thing in life, then the whole world would be in love with my husband ...and I can't take that kind of competition! So, knowing that different kinds of music move different folks - my choices may not be for everyone - but I thought I would share a few that get me shakin' my tail feather....

These all... for the most part...keep in time with Tracy's cardio: A mix of Old School and Current...

"Ring My Bell" - Anita Ward  (****please note...my husband is the drummer and back ground singer on this song!!!! hahaah! gotta love that!)

 "Boom Boom Pow" - Black Eyed Peas
 "I Gotta Feeling" - Black Eyed Peas
 "Pump it"- Black Eyed Peas

"Club can't Even Handle Me Right Now" - Flo-rida
"Low" - Flo-rida
"Sugar" Flo-rida

"Keeps Gettin' Better" - Christina Aguilera
"Baby I'm a Star" - Prince and The Revolution
 Glamorous" - Fergie
"That's Not My Name" - Ting Tings

...and I added a few for my guest blogger - remember her? the precious , beautiful soul who was involved with the human fecal matter of a man... yah him...argh.  I threw a few extras on for her that I highly recommend if you are dancing your way through a heartache...

"FU" - Cee Lo Green
"Womanizer" - Brittany Spears
"You Can't Touch This" - MC Hammer

Just sayin'.... what ever gets ya through it!

I have found that something as simple as adding a few new songs every ten days of so keeps things from getting too boring - especially in light of repeating the same moves every day.

And as long as we are talking about music - I wanted to tell you all a story a very famous friend of mine recently shared with me.
If you remember from an earlier blog - my husband and I are in the music business. Through the course of our work we have become very good friends with many people that most would consider "famous"...
and I am here to tell you that when they say "famous people are people just like us" - that is so true.

I mean, they are just like us, except they usually have A LOT more money,  are better looking and more talented. Other than that - they are JUST like us. Almost identical.
OH! and they get better tables at places and probably don't have to pay for the $600 a bottle vodka  - and they get their pictures taken all the time and complete strangers want to be their friends and ask them to sign napkins and stuff.
You know - the more I really think about it - they aren't like us AT ALL.
Yes, they are just like us, only infinitely better!!!!

I'm kidding..well, kind of! I will tell you where they are either "like us" or "not like us"...they are either lovely, wonderful "normal" people, or they aren't!!

Anyhoo- I'm on a tangent, sorry.  I brought this up to simply share with you the story my friend  recently told me and although it was no big deal - I have thought about it several times since then.

She said she was recently sent a photo of herself in a gorgeous dress, hair and make up was done and she thought to herself " Damn, I look pretty good. Wait, maybe a little too good. OK...send me THE ORIGINAL!" Then she laughed at herself, rolled her eyes and said" Ya right, I wish I looked like that! Her "people" then sent her the un re-touched original photo. She laughed and said - Now that's more like it! That's what I thought...!"

The reason this stuck with me is that... first of all - it is important to understand that this woman is GORGEOUS! Fit, beautiful skin, great everything! She works hard to stay that way and it shows.
Secondly - she had her hair and makeup done professionally the night the photo was taken and was wearing a dress that -this part I'm guessing - had been picked out by a professional stylist...or maybe even made specifically for her. More than likely one of the two.

So they took a gorgeous woman, professionally coiffed and dressed...and THEN "FIXED" the photo!!!!!! The original was gorgeous!

But they "FIXED" it... and these are the images that we, the not-so-famous women in the world, compare ourselves to day in and day out.

Trust me folks - I have seen the wizard behind the curtain.  In this regard- celebrities are JUST like us!
We ALL look our best when we spend two hours in hair and make up, have industrial strength spanks on under a designer dress and are lit properly! Then photo shopped!!!! I know - I'm not famous... but I've done it before- the hair, the make up ...it really helps. I mean REALLY helps!!!

Then there are the fashion magazines - don't even get me started. Never do I feel so ugly as when I buy a BEAUTY magazine. ahahah!
Models are genetic mutants - (I mean that with no disrespect - because they are amazing to look at and  I would love to be a six foot tall- legs for days- mutant!) but I simply mean that it is rare that someone is so perfectly attractive that they get paid just to be stunning.

I'm actually a fan of anyone that excels in a field enough to be the very best at it! Be famous! Be a smokin' hot genetic mutant of a woman! Be drop dead gorgeous in a photo! Be everything you want to be!!!

But I have to frequently remind myself that I should not COMPARE myself to those photos - those perfectly "fixed" photos when I'm sitting in my house in my bathrobe, or working out, or cooking dinner, or watching a movie.
Because I have been with those gorgeous, famous woman when they were doing more mundane things and although they are still stunning (because more than anything it's their spirit and their heart that make them beautiful in the first place) they do not look EXACTLY like those photos.

They all complain about flaws, imperfections, CELLULITE, old man stomach skin - you name it -
they sound just like us... and look just like us! Hey- I've changed my mind again...
They are a lot like us.

The only PERFECT people in the world are the ones we don't know very well.
 
They are mothers, daughters, friends, wives, sisters, employees, employers - all trying to look their best, do their best, be their best - make the best of what they've got.
...and aren't we all!

I guess that's my point - strive for YOUR best - and what is your best?  That can only be defined by you. Define it, be it, be happy with it.

It's only a trap, if we set it.


Hey...could someone please help me down from my soap box - I would hate to injure myself right before the the new muscle work!!!!!

I'm really chatty tonight!
Must be because James is in NY - he was on The Mike Huckabee show tonight on FOX. James you looked so handsome!!!! I'm glad you are on your way home!

I'm going to rock another day tomorrow - starting at 6:00am on a SUNDAY!!! why...because the Titans are playing at noon and I want to be sure and cripple myself before I go to the game!!!!

Talk to you guys tomorrow!


 20 days down...
10  days to go...

all BY THE BOOK...

xoxxLa

PS- weight is STILL hanging in there at 129! five days in a row now!!! eeeeeekkkkk!
I guess well see what happens in the morning!

Friday, October 22, 2010

DAY NINETEEN - Here are my NUMBERS!!!!!! (measure/ pinch #2)

Is everyone sitting down....
Because you ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE what I'm about to tell you all!!!!!

I was pinched and measured today and I about FELL OVER when I saw the results!!!!!

I was so worried that I felt "puffy"(as I mentioned in my mid day post)  and my pinch and inches lost numbers might not be that great... but LOOK OUT PEOPLE...
I kicked Thass!!!

After posting some fairly significant losses after the first ten days I was prepared to not see anything close to those figures - especially since I lost 9 pounds in the first ten days and only 3 in the second ten days (and if you want to be exact - only three pounds in the second NINE days, for we measured a day early) but low and behold...I exceeded the numbers and inches lost from the first ten days!!!!!

SWARE!

I'm so excited, I really can't believe it!!!

So the first column is where I began, the second are results after first ten days on the TAM program and the third column (on the right ) are my results from today!!! Then total losses on far right in red...


                                            DAY 1                DAY 10               DAY 19 (TODAY)               TOTAL LOST

WEIGHT :                            141                      132                        129                                   12 lbs!!!

BODY FAT:                          26.4%                 22.90%                  18.8%                              -7.6%!!!

INCHES LOST:                    ----                      -5.75"                     -8"                                  -13.75"!!!

TOTAL MM's:                      133.5                   110.5                      85                                   -48.5 !!!!

CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE THAT???

I have NEVER been below 20% body fat - EVER! Never, ever, ever, ever...until today that is! :)

The first ten days I lost 3.5 % body fat (or 23. 5mm on skin fold test) - the second ten days I lost an additional 4.1% (or 25mm from the skinfold test) resulting in -7.6%!!

and I lost 8 inches!!! and that is in the last TEN DAYS...after losing almost 6" inches the first ten days - almost 14" total - that's CRAZY!


I can post all the exact numbers if anyone cares. Let me know and I will list all the numbers so you can see how much is coming off -and from where. We have been doing a standard 7 point skin fold pinch to measure body fat and measuring 10 points on the body.

Todays' biggest loss in regards to inches was on my belly!! (hence the old man skin, right??)
1.75" lost and ...and my hiney became a little more tiny...by  1" !!! if you add that to the 1"off each of my thighs - that would be a total of 3" off the ole "Thass Region"...in ten days- not too shabby and gettin' less flabby!

You hear that Farmer Celly - you just lost three acres of prime real estate! Ha- suck it!

I also talked to my friend and trainer (the guy who measures me and is REALLY knowledgeable about all things body) and he said that it is very normal to have a "crash day" -where the workout seems impossible - after a couple of great, strong days. He went on to explain what now seems obvious -when you are feeling strong and working out hard - you are giving more, pushing harder and working to your max...so every few days your body just gets tired and needs to catch up - which is why I have been struggling every five days or so - but then it gets better- so hang in there!!

I am so thrilled about my results ... that I am kind of worshiping Tracy Anderson right now.
I would drink that woman's bath water if she told me to!!

Seriously - this is remarkable!

Thanks Tracy, for putting in ten years of hard work on research so I could put in 19 days of hard work and get such amazing results! I can't wait to see what will happen in the next eleven days...hmmmm?

Too bad I can't burn calories when I use exclamation points - I would be down another 3 pounds!!! Sorry - guess I'm excited  ... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I highly suggest that anyone doing this program measure and pinch before you start - it has really  helped to inspire me and put the hard work into concrete numbers. I felt lousy today until I got my numbers and then I was re-energized and ready to rock out the last eleven days...it's helping to keep me focused so I can finish strong.

I have had several requests for a video blog and or some photos - so I promise I'll try and figure that out. Thanks again for ALL THE SUPPORT - and I'm equally excited about everyone else and their progress - keep up the good work! And please keep the comments and updates on your progress coming my way! I love them all!

I think I may go stare at myself in the mirror naked for a while...just sayin'.

19 DAYS DOWN...
11 DAYS TO GO...

and BY THE BOOK!!!!!!

xoxoxLa

PS- I bought some new jeans today... they were size 26....are you kidding me, I needed a 26??? They are tight...but they fit!!!!!    SCHWWWEEEEEEETTTT!!!

DAY NINETEEN... (mid day - post workout special report!)

OH MY GOD!!!!!

That was a NIGHTMARE!!!! Seriously... a nightmare today trying to get through my workout.

It felt like I was in one of those horrible movies or dreams where you are running and screaming trying to get away from the masked serial killer and although they only walk and don't swing their arms...they always catch you!!!!

Today's work out was like that...

No one can hear me screaming. No one is going to come help me. I am alone in the woods with a cellulite farmer and he has a machete.

I'm so screwed...or am I????

I guess I finally woke up from the nightmare (read: I am done with the 2.5 hours of living hell) and it was so bad that it was comical.

It was so bad, in fact - that I had to come tell you all about it right now. I couldn't wait until tonight for fear I would forget just how bad it really was to get through today.

I am guessing it is tied to my body trying to keep up with all the change AND it's other monthly "duties".  Whatever the case may be - that shit was HARD!!!!

At one point I was screaming like Steve Carell in the movie  '40 Year Old Virgin'... you all know the scene... where he getting his chest hair waxed off... well, that was me today!!!!
"Ohhhhhhhh! KELLY CLARKSON!!!!!!!" followed by a few F bombs ... mixed with a few words I just made up because the old ones no longer seemed sufficient. I was thankful James was not home.

(sidenote: I could listen to Kelly Clarkson sing the phone book and think it was the most amazing thing I'd ever heard! And on top of being amazingly talented, she's funny as hell and she's basically just cool cat city.  An all around kick ass chick. If you don't already worship her...you should start immediately)

I was thinking about getting through the workout today -  and getting measured and pinched today- and ya know - I think part of what was bothering me was I feel very "puffy" today (again - it all seems to be cyclical) and it kind of irritated me.
I was sort of getting pissy about working so hard and digging so deep and feeling like Farmer Celly (I think that's what I will call him from this point forward) was kind of mocking me and dancing with his walker and making fun of me - he kept saying maybe I needed a walker too. I hate him. Mean old sum b...
Don't get me wrong - I feel thinner, more muscular, etc - just felt puffy and was annoyed by that - I am not in the mood to retain water. But apparently Farmer Celly has re-routed the irrigation system to try to water his crops, he's tricky, that little old man. But I will flood him with more water than he could ever contain today and come out victorious!

I started laughing at myself at one point during the cardio because I was flailing around ( Seinfeld's Elaine was sooooo BACK IN THE HOUSE TODAY) that I thought if Tracy could see me she would probably say ..."Seriously, please just stop. You're upsetting me"

hahaahah!! oh well - screw Farmer Celly! and Tracy...you'll just have to be proud I kept going - ugly as it was -because I got through it!!!!!

I did notice - that it was EXACTLY this time last week that I thought I was going to crumble and not make it through - could just be that by the end of the week I am spent. Weekends are a little easier because I can sleep a little later and start a little later...who knows. I guess it's just part of it.
At least it will make me appreciate it when it seems more manageable again.
Dear heavens above... let it seem more manageable again soon!

Well... I'm going to go shower so I can work more and then get measured!! I am not really sure how that will come out today (again - why I was getting annoyed today - it's "measure day" and I feel puffy)
I know it doesn't matter - I have been by the book for 18.5 days - I can't help it if I'm puffy today - AND I KNOW that won't stay that way - it just is what it is ladies and gentlemen!!!

Steer the course! Hang in there! It's the big picture that matters....

I GOT THIS! I will make it through thirty days if it kills me!!!!!!

Oh, and if it in fact, this does kill me -  please DO NOT put me in a casket!!!! I do not like enclosed spaces and am highly opposed to synthetic fabrics.

I cannot imagine spending en eternity lying in some god forsaken poly blend satin, that has been poorly tufted and quilted. Just a horrible thought. Would it be too much to ask for someone to line a casket in cashmere....? uh, hello.

Please cremate me and sprinkle my ashes half over Neimans and half in  Tracy's Kale Juice. Drink up Tracy!!!! :) How do you like me now??????

You guys have a great day!!!!!

I'll be back tonight with my day 20 numbers!!! (I know - one day early - but my "measurer " would like to spend time with his family on the weekend.. how selfish, right? I cannot believe measuring my Thass doesn't mean more to him than his family.... very strange to me, oh well, to each his own) good, bad or ugly - I will post them tonight and I will not let them re-dial my station to KFUK if they aren't great - I'm doing the best I can!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH! and it was kind of like Christmas today , after all!!! Yesterday I looked at the wrong menu day and today was Mango smoothie day!!!!!! There really is a Santa Clause!
Let's see... Mango smoothie or hard boiled egg and Kale juice?????.... uh... that's like asking me - would you like an hour long massage...OR... a root canal followed by a colonoscopy.
I'm going with the massage. Mainly because I'm not stupid.


I feel great now that it's over - just wanted to make sure you all knew that it is HARDER SOME DAYS THAN OTHERS... for me anyway!!!!

Let's do this thang!

later with numbers....

xoxxoLa